A man goes to the doctor

After a thorough physical examination:

Doctor: “We can’t find anything physically wrong with you that would turn your weapon orange.

I’ll be honest, I’ve never seen anything like this, perhaps it’s a psychological issue.

Have you been under a lot of stress lately, maybe at your job?”

Man: “Well I did just get laid off.”

Doctor: “Well there you go, maybe that’s it.”

Man: “No, that can’t be it because I got a new job soon after. It’s great, I have way better hours and I’m making more money than I ever have.”

Doctor: “Oh, well what about at home?”

Man: “I did go through a divorce recently.”

Doctor: “Hmmm… that could be it then.”

Man: “That can’t be it either because I just started dating someone who is gorgeous and way better to me than my ex ever was.”

Doctor: “Well I don’t know what to say, what do you do for hobbies?”

Man: “Oh, I mostly sit around watching porn and eating Cheetos.”