A blonde walks into an empty bar

A blonde walks into an empty bar on New Year’s Eve and asks the bartender if she can use his phone to wish her family back in St. Louis a happy new year.

“Well,” starts the bartender, “the rates are pretty high on New Year’s. You’ll have to leave me a couple of bucks.”

“Oh, darn!” she replies, “I don’t have a dime! What am I gonna do? This is my first holiday without my family.”

The bartender gives it about 2 seconds thought and comes back with a proposal.

“Why don’t you just come back here behind the bar… I’m sure we can work out a way for you to speak with them.”

Eagerly, the blonde runs behind the bar just as the bartender starts to unzip his fly and pull out his mickey.

“Okay, honey,” he says as he gestures towards his, “just put your mouth up to this!”

Desperately wanting to do as he says, the girl kneels down and does what she’s told.

She brings her mouth up to his and quizzically goes “Hello, Mom?”