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There was once a small town

There was once a small town called Redditville.

In this town lived a homeless man named ThunderingSacks.
Our homeless hero was well known for taking a dump in public at the same spot every day.
In this spot was a 2×4 piece of wood. It pointed straight up out the ground.

One day while doing his business, ThunderingSacks heard a scream. A young woman was being chased by a man with a knife.
ThunderingSacks pulled up his trousers and ran to her rescue. He was able to scare the attacker off but only after being stabbed.

Dying, ThunderingSacks beckoned the girl over.
He whispered in her ear, “Take care of my poop station.” ThunderingSacks was no more.

After his passing, word got out about his heroic deed.
People from all over town went to the 2×4 that was his restroom and threw money and jewelry at it to pay respect.

Two men stood watching. The first man said, “If only we appreciate him more when he was alive.”
The second man replies,
“Yes, he was a good man.
Nobody would have expected that his shitpost would be riddled with platinum, gold, and silver

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