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A man offers a girl in his office $1,000 to sleep with him. “I’ll put the money on the floor, you bend down, and I’ll be...
A man walks into a bar and says to the bartender, “I bet you fifty dollars that I can bite my right eye.” The bartender says,...
A farmer and his wife were lying in bed one evening; she was knitting, he was reading the latest issue of Animal Husbandry. He looks up...
A guy is 86 years old and loves to fish. He was sitting in his boat the other day when he heard a voice say, “Pick...
A beautiful woman loved growing tomatoes, but couldn’t seem to get her tomatoes to turn red. One day, while taking a stroll, she came upon a...
The angry wife met her husband at the door. There was alcohol on his breath and lipstick on his cheek. “I assume,” she snarled, “that there...
This married couple was sitting in a fine restaurant when the wife looks over at a nearby table and sees a man in a drunken stupor....
A fellow nurse at my hospital received a call from an anxious patient. “I’m diabetic and I’m afraid I’ve had too much sugar today.” the caller...
A woman sat down on a park bench, glanced around and decided to stretch out her legs on the seat and relax. After awhile a beggar...
A pregnant woman went to the gynecologist, and when asked that was the problem, she responded, “Well, whenever I take off my clothes, my melons get...
A girl came skipping home from school one day. “Mommy, Mommy,” she yelled, “we were counting today, and all the other kids could only count to...
A lady walks into the drug store and asks the druggist for some arsenic. The druggist asks, “Ma’am, what do you want with arsenic?” The lady...
A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow’s final exam. ‘Now class, I won’t tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider...
This young couple invited their parson for Sunday dinner. While they were in the kitchen preparing the meal, the minister asked their young son what they...
A golfer was having a tough day and in his frustration he blurted out, “I would give anything for a birdie on this h*le.” A nearby...
A man hasn’t been feeling well, so he goes to his doctor for a complete checkup. Afterward the doctor comes out with the results. “I’m afraid...
A blonde was driving down the road and she looks up and she sees a tree so she swerves to the left. The tree is still...
Murphy and his wife went for a stroll in the park. They sit down on a bench to rest for awhile. Soon they overhear voices coming...
A man went to the doctor complaining of insomnia. The doctor gave him a thorough examination but found absolutely nothing physically wrong with him. “Listen,” the...
Joe had asked Bob to help him out with the deck after work, so Bob just went straight over to Joe’s place. When they got to...
