Wife sends a text message to her husband on a really cold winter morning: Windows are totally frozen, will not open. Husband replies: “Carefully pour some...
A man well into his seventies asks his wife: “Mary, doesn’t it make you sad when you see me running after those young girls sometimes?” “Not...
A guy walks up to a caretaker in a dog shelter: “I’d like to adopt a dog. Do you have one that’s really loyal?” The caretaker...
Two teenagers, Fred and Joe, meet after school and Fred is all excited: “Man I was at the most awesome party this weekend! We went to...
An old lady comes in for her medical check-up: “Doctor Ribbit, you remember how you warned me that I should avoid going up and down stairs...
A Harley biker is riding by the zoo in Taronga Park, Sydney when he sees a little girl leaning into the lion’s cage. Suddenly, the lion...
A 19-year-old Italian girl tells her Mom that she has missed her period for two months. Very worried, the mother goes to the drugstore and buys...
A woman joins a country club and one day hears the guys talking about their golf round. She says, “I played on my college’s golf team....
A Nazi walks into a bar, looks around, and notices an older orthodox Jewish man seated at a nearby table. Barman, he says, “A round on...
A man is playing with a stray dog. His wife says, “Don’t play with this ugly and disgusting thing!” The husband defends, “Come on. He isn’t...