A man drinks a shot of whiskey every night before bed. After years of this, the wife wants him to quit. She gets two shot glasses,...
A police officer sees a blonde woman crying under a street lamp on the sidewalk. He asks her what’s wrong and if there’s anything he can...
A man walks into a bar and orders a shot, then he looks into his shirt pocket and orders another one. After he finishes, he looks...
Two blondes were trapped in an elevator. One was crying in the corner and the other one was shouting, ”HELP! HELP!” Then the one crying had...
A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another...
A blonde is swimming in a river. A man walks up and asks her, “What are you doing in there?” She says, “I’m washing my clothes.”...
My friend asked me, “Why are you getting a divorce?” I responded, “My wife wasn’t home the entire night and in the morning she said she...
A blonde goes to her doctor and says that every time she drinks a coffee her eye hurts. The doctor prepared her a hot, fresh cup...
A man goes to see a wizard and says, “Can you lift a curse that a priest put on me years ago?” “Maybe,” says the wizard,...
A blonde decides to try horseback rising. On her first outing, the bouncing horse causes her to lose control. As she’s thrown from the horse, her...
Two blondes were shopping at the mall. When they were done, they went out to their car, an awesome leather-interior convertible, but they realized they had...
Four blondes are ordering a few rounds of drinks. Each time they get up, they toast and say, “14 weeks,” then they down their drinks. The...
A husband, who has six children, begins to call his wife “mother of six” rather than by her first name. The wife, amused at first, chuckles....
A blonde is walking down the street and a car pulled up next to her. The man in the car says to her, ”What do you...
A man and a woman are sleeping together when suddenly there is a noise in the house, and the woman rolls over and says, “It’s my...
The blonde walks into a drugstore and asks the pharmacist for some bottom deodorant. The pharmacist, a little bemused, explains to the woman that they don’t...
Two men were talking. “So, how’s your make love life?” “Oh, nothing special. I’m having Social Security lovemaking.” “Social Security lovemaking?” “Yeah, you know, I get...
A married couple are out one night at a dance club. There’s a guy on the dance floor giving it large: break dancing, moon walking, back...
Two blondes walk beside each other down the street. One of them sees a broken piece of mirror on the ground, grabs it, looks at it...
One day, a blonde went to the doctor with both sides of her face burned. The doctor asked, “What happened?” The blonde said, “Well, I was...