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Four elderly ranchers were enjoying breakfast in a small cafe in northern Arizona. They were talking about everything from cattle, horses, and weather, to how things...
A blonde was summoned to court to appear as a witness in a lawsuit. The prosecutor opened his questioning with, “Where were you the night of...
An older gentleman was on the operating table awaiting surgery, and he insisted that his son, a renowned surgeon, perform the operation. As he was about...
A woman’s husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she had stayed by his bedside every single day. One...
A man went to his lawyer and told him, “My neighbor owes me $500 and he doesn’t want to pay up what should I do?” “Do...
Paddy was summoned to court to appear as a witness in a lawsuit. The prosecutor opened his questioning with, “Where were you the night of August...
A man who had just undergone a very complicated operation kept complaining about a bump on his head and a terrible headache. Since his operation had...
Two Irishmen walk into a pet shop right away they go over to the bird section. Gerry says to Paddy, “That’s them”. The clerk comes over...
He starts dialing numbers on his hand, like a telephone, and talking into his hand. The bartender walks over and tells him this is a very...
One sunny day a man decided to go jump from an airplane. When he jumped there was good and bad news. Good news: He had a...
Two men were hunting in the woods when, all of a sudden, one man had a heart attack. The other called 911. Someone answered, and he...
A man died and went to straight down to hell. The devil greeted him and gave him a guided tour of the place. He told the...
A man lives in a high rise on the 15th floor. Every morning, on the way to work, he takes the elevator all the way down...
A police officer asks a thief, “Why did you steal this stranger’s watch?” The thief replies, “I didn’t steal it — he gave it to me!”...
Three men are playing golf at a Country Club: Obi Wan Ken-obi, Darth Maul and a very old man. Obi Wan tees off and hits his...
A blonde heard that baths in milk would make her beautiful. She left a note for her milkman to leave 25 gallons of milk. When the...
A father buys a lie detector robot that slaps you when you lie. He decides to test it out on his son at supper. Dad says:...
A frog telephoned the Psychic Hotline and was told, “You are going to meet a beautiful young woman who will want to know everything about you.”...
A man is in bed with his wife when there is a rat-a-tat-tat on the door. He rolls over and looks at his clock, and it’s...
The first one married a woman from Minneapolis, and said to her: “When I get back from work, I want the house to be clean and...
